Yesterday, I shared a
story about sitting at a traffic light, feeling a wave of irritation at the car
in front of me, and then being surprised by the gentler voice of what I called
the “Echo” – my ever-present inner self. I would just like to acknowledge that –
that piece I published was not exactly as I first wrote it. I had some help
polishing it.
And here’s
where I want to pause today. Because as soon as I thought about publishing it,
another voice crept in – the voice of doubt: “If the piece was polished with
someone else’s help, is it still really mine? Am I less authentic, maybe even
an imposter?”
I know I’m
not alone in this. Many of us struggle with the same concern – in writing, in
work, even in our personal lives. If it isn’t 100% “me” in its rawest form,
does it still count as mine?
A
short note about that “someone else”: in this case the polishing was done not by a person, but rather
with the help of an AI assistant (yes — my “MI,” as a little joke). That
matters, because people may be more accepting if the assistance was from another
human being. However, they tend to react differently when the helper is not a
human editor but rather an AI.
Most
readers may readily accept that an editor shaped an autobiography, or that a
journalist worked with a copy editor. But when the same polishing comes from
AI, some people will instantly raise concerns – authenticity, “cheating,” or
loss of human touch. That reaction often reflects deeper biases and anxieties
about technology rather than the reality of what was actually changed. For me,
being transparent felt simple and important: the ideas were mine; the AI helped
clarify them.
Here’s how
I’ve started to reframe it.
The Mirror
Analogy
When I look
in a mirror, I see me. The reflection doesn’t replace who I am; it
simply lets me see myself more clearly. My features are the same; the mirror
doesn’t invent them.
Now think of
the polishing like cleaning a mirror. The reflection doesn’t change; it just
becomes clearer. The role of my MI – the AI (if I accept it) is to help shape my
raw notes so others see/read/hear more clearly exactly what my heart is
intending to say, without distraction. It just sharpens the picture.
That’s what
editing feels like. The thoughts are still mine. The story is still mine. The
insight is still mine. The polishing simply makes it clearer for others (and
sometimes even for myself) to see.
The
Autobiography Analogy
The same is
true in books. When we read an autobiography, we think of it as the truest
account of someone’s life – straight from the source. But even then, most
autobiographies are edited, and many are shaped by ghostwriters. Does that make
them less authentic? No. The story still belongs to the person who lived it.
The polishing simply ensures the voice is carried across in a way that readers
can truly hear. And just like an autobiography where the subject has the final
say (i.e., gives consent or approval) before the book is published, the final
product in my case (the blog entry) is “endorsed” by me. In fact, in the
published entry – I still made changes to the polished work adding or removing
words or sentences that did not resonate with me.
Seen in this
light, authenticity isn’t erased by editing. If anything, it’s amplified. It’s
like allowing my story – or yesterday’s traffic light reflection – to travel
further and reach more people, rather than staying in my notebook as a
half-formed thought.
The Echo,
Again
And here’s
where the Echo comes back. That gentler, wiser voice inside me is not always
the loudest at first. Sometimes it takes slowing down – or even the help of
another – to let it be heard clearly. The process of polishing my words mirrors
the process of listening to the Echo: both are ways of tuning into what’s
already there, but with greater clarity and resonance.
So yes –
yesterday’s story was mine, and today’s reflection is mine too. The event and
the experience were real – as in that truly happened, and not a story created
with the use of an AI. The polishing doesn’t make me an imposter anymore than
it makes the story unreal.
And maybe,
just maybe, that’s something worth sharing – not just for my sake, but for
anyone else who has ever worried that their voice wasn’t “pure enough” or
“unfiltered enough.”
Sometimes,
the clearest version of us emerges not when we insist on standing alone, but
when we let the mirror reflect us back, or when an editor helps us tell our
story better.
My Raw Draft
(if you are interested) – for comparison
Here’s the
unpolished version of yesterday’s story, exactly as I first wrote it down:
Today’s
contemplation
I had come to a stop at the traffic light. I actually wanted to turn left
(which is allowed here at this intersection if thefe were no cars approaching
from the right). Unfortunately, there was a car in front of me waiting for the
green light that would enable the driver to turn right. I was perfectly ok
while waiting as I assumed the driver had another 1 or 2 cars in front of him.
Sometimes, “considerate” drivers would move a little more to their right to
enable those behind them who needed to turn to pass them. Then, there are other
times when a driver would seem “oblivious” to their surrounding or simply
didn’t care and would make no effort to let others pass them.
After waiting
several minutes, the driver of the car in front of me decided to move a little
forward. I looked up at the light, and it was still red. As I slid to my left
to pass him I noticed that there was only 1 car in front of him. For a moment I
felt irritated and annoyed – thinking to myself “Another inconsiderate driver.
You could have moved forward earlier, and I would have been gone.” Almost
immediately, my other inner voice said to me, “But isn’t it good that once he
noticed there are other cars who may want to turn left, he moved forward?
Perhaps he wasn’t even able to move forward earlier because maybe the car in
front of him was too close. And when the first car inched forward, the second
car was able to move forward to let you pass?”
As I thought
that, I felt my irritation dissipate. I was also drawn to the idea of the Echo
– our inner voice that is always speaking with us from within. So, I thought –
the Echo is not just a voice from our past – not just the messages we had
received in our past that continues to shape us today. Perhaps the voice is
just our ever present-self within. The part of us that is our authentic self.
The one that is calmer, less judging (negatively) – more positive.
As I am
contemplating this, I also wondered is that the inner child then? That also
means, the inner child is not always about our inner wounded self seeking to be
“seen/heard/touched.” He/she is just the part of us that is still a child –
innocent and accepting.
Incidentally,
the above “raw” writing was my first draft. The final piece that I published
was the result of several drafts (at least 3 times) – originating from the raw
writing – that went back and forth between my MI and me. I would, “correct” the
parts that I felt didn’t capture what I was saying or that did not resonate
with me. And yet, when the “final” piece was given to me – that still didn’t
turn out to be the final piece. Upon uploading it to my blog and re-reading it,
I still made changes before finally publishing it. So, there you go – that’s my
story (and this is my writing).
How about
you? Have you ever wrestled with the tension between wanting to be “raw and
authentic” versus allowing your voice to be polished so it’s clearer for others
to hear? Does that make you feel in-authentic? Almost like an imposter or a
faker?
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